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Starting Over

User
Posted 10 Sep 2014 at 05:08

Agree with Paul mo...A very emotional journey but hopefully one that will ultimately give you some satisfaction and pleasure having fulfilled one of Micks final wishes

Take care
Bri xx

User
Posted 10 Sep 2014 at 19:33

My SS Mandy Mo,

What a trip, this is going to be very emotional for you but as you have said before this is a place that you and Mick love . It is very fitting that this is the place that Mick chose.

Have a wonderful trip. Come back with some new stories of your adventure and of course lots of pics.

Lots of love

BFN

Julie X

NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON
User
Posted 10 Sep 2014 at 21:18
Mo

That trip will be emotional and wonderful and a real challenge all at the same time. Knowing you, you will ace it.

Looking forward to hearing all about it on your return.

Safe journey dear friend

Love Allison xxx

User
Posted 23 Sep 2014 at 18:12
So here I am sitting in our Condo in Lake Buena Vista Florida, into my second week of a 5 week epic.

For anyone every contemplating taking your loved one's ashes abroad to be laid to rest be aware of the Jobsworth piece of inhuanity I had to deal with at Manchester airport. I had been meticulous in gaining all the correct paperwork, carrying Mick's ashes in a purpose built bio degradble cardboard tube, packing them along with the paperwork into a carry on bag that meets all airlines specifications. So what could possibly go wrong? At check in the lovely lady from Vorgin gave me a spcial security pass to fast track through a massive queue for security. She also told me to gain the attention of one of the security staff ahead of the scanners to explain what I was carrying so that they could deal with me appropriately.

I did just that and spent the next 10 minutes trying to explain to a young head phone toting gum chewing chap who had limited command of the English language to start with. I tried to explain what was in my bag but he just told me to stop stressing and whacked the whole thing into the scanner and proceeded to shoo me to go through the dreaded x ray tube myself, now no laughing at this point please....the underwiring in my bra set the scanners off (at least that was what the lady said as she frisked me and waved her weirdy wand thing over me) so I move along to hopefully be reunited with my handbag and carry on bag AKA Mick. Neither item was at the collection point so a mild panic started to set in as you might imagine. Finally another less young and thankfully not gum chewing chap looks my way and summonses me to the end of the collection point where my handbag sits untouched but my carry on bag has been virtually dismantled. "What is this" he says pointing at the tube .. my Husband's ashes and I have the necessary paperwork right here I reply .. why didn't you report these before screening he challenges, well actually I did to your colleague over on the other side but he did not seem to understand me at all.

OK now I am going to have to swab them and check it is what you have said ... at this pont I asked if he could have just a little more respect and perhaps we could continue somewhere out of the public area like that little cubby hole over there although by now I was visibly crying so probably not forming coherent words. After a further 2 or 3 minutes of prodding and poking, swabbing etc the whole opened carry on bag and its contents was shoved back at me together with my handbag to repack. I started to put things together and was told in a very officious tone you can't do that here move over to that table over there. Oh you mean the one in the cubby hole that I wanted to go to in the first place. By now I was past crying and almost into a rage I felt Mick urging me to pick him up and whack the guy over the head but I resisted. Laughably my Humira injections for my Rheumatoid arthritis attracted no attention at all maybe I should have crackeed one of them open and stabbed him with it!

anyway the flight was great have to say Virgin Atlantic did a really good job of looking after me cusomer services had informed them the reason for my trip and they could not have been more helpful.

Arrival at Orlando and I did the usual mad dash to immigration, Mick always made us sit near the plane exit so we could be first off and virtually run there so I did the same this time. I was first in line and through in minutes when I collected my bags I looked back to see a queue of Disneyesque proportions so it had been worth the dash.

Collected my car a Nissan Rogue (hope that was not how I was meant to drive it) anyway I remembered Si telling me that he had done his bit by giving Mick a very smooth ride to the airport so now I just needed to ensure that I did not frog leap all the way to the Condo. Actually t was a piece of cake, I enjoyed driving so much I spent the next 2 days driving to all my favourite stores to shop till I dropped.

Friends and family of friends arrived on Wednesday, lots of hugs and tears initially but then 4 days of fun and laughter.

Now I am solo again still with Mick's ashes which stay with me until stage 2 of the trip next week when I go to see my lovely friends in Georgia.

Feeling quite lonely but managing to keep busy with my Understanding the genetics of cancer course and getting ready for the new one with Paul Yorkhull which starts soon.

My lovely caring daughter Karen is in touch daily (as are many of my friends on this forum) she had coffee with Karen Newman a couple of times last week whilst on holiday in Weymouth. so life really does go on it is just tough sarting over

xxx

Mo

Edited by member 23 Sep 2014 at 18:15  | Reason: Not specified

User
Posted 23 Sep 2014 at 18:47

Good to hear you are surviving Mo and not surprised at the ups and downs, it's bound for happen but you will find the strength to carry you through. I am not amazed but absolutely appalled at your treatment at the airport. Total lack of respect and it must have been heart breaking. Still you got Mick there and you will lay him to rest, an epic journey for both of you.

Look forward to seeing you online soon on the course.

User
Posted 23 Sep 2014 at 19:04

Hi Mo,

I was shocked to read about your ordeal at Manchester airport.
That was absolutely shameful.

But I was relieved you kept your indomitable spirit, and that everything improved for you once you took off.

If ever there was a 'real trouper'..... : )


Looking forward to seeing you again soon,

Warmest wishes always,

George

User
Posted 23 Sep 2014 at 21:32

Mo you are such a brave inspirational woman. I so admire your spirit. It is shocking what you had to go through at the airport. I hoe the rest of your trip goes well

best wishes

Lorraine x

User
Posted 23 Sep 2014 at 23:53

I think Mick will have had a good chuckle from wherever he is watching over you. If it is any reassurance to others, we had none of this horrendous treatment when we took ashes to Australia; we tucked the tube into the small suitcase and carried the paperwork on us but it wasn't even noticed.

Take care of yourself xxx

"Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." Soren Kierkegaard

User
Posted 24 Sep 2014 at 14:09

Good luck Mo, give someone a hat and "jobsworth" doesn't bear thinking about, well done for making it so far !

Chris.

User
Posted 24 Sep 2014 at 21:15

SS,

I know how difficult you are finding this trip it must be full of so many memories for you and the realisation of why you are there. I know it was Mick's last wishes but you can always change your mind and bring him back to England. Si won't mind an extra passenger.

A good friend of mine (Debbie ) she won't mind me using her name has her Mum's ashes in the lounge, she always says she is deciding where to sprinkle the ashes and she hasn't made up her mind yet. In reality she hasn't found the right place in 5 years and finds it impossible to say the last goodbye.

You are strong and you will get through this, next week surrounded by old friends will be easier.

One last thing to say, Jolly hockey sticks.http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-smile.gif

BFN

Julie XXXXXX

NEVER LAUGH AT A LIVE DRAGON
User
Posted 24 Sep 2014 at 22:11
Hello Mo

sorry to read about your recent problems it dosent get any easier no matter how strong people assume we are my heart goes out to you.It is a very lonely time hopefully with all your friends around you It will make this trip easier for you and Mick will always be with you in your heart no matter where you are.

Have a good holiday

Best Wishes

Carol

User
Posted 02 Oct 2014 at 21:21
After just over 10 days at our holiday Condo in Lake Buena Vista I started to feel really lonely and too far away from friends and family. Thankfully two girlfriends of mine came to stay last weekend, Leda is Stephanie's Mum, Mick and I cruised with them regularly and we see them often. They visited Mick in Hospice the week before he passed away. They are great friends and did a fantastic job of cheering me up and getting me through another weekend.

Monday morning I flew up to Atlanta Georgia having changed my plans by bringing everything forward a little, I was greeted at the airport by Joy and her youngest daughter Ellie, back nto the arms of "family" strictly not true but after 12 years of close friendship and being in the O'Fee family I consider them to be my family as well

We had a wonderful weather forecast for Wednesday 1st October and as everyone could be here we decided to scatter Mick's ashes today. Karen and all our family and friends at home knew the time would be about 7pm Uk time so that they could join in virtually.

We had a short delay for Robert to deal with an errant snake which had strayed into the pasture from the woods but we had a short ceremony of scattering his ashes under the big oak tree, toasting Mick with a glass of champagne (scotch for Robert and OJ for Ellie) we all gave him some of our drink and Robert read a poem he had written about his friend. It was witty, funny and very moving.

So now I can truly say Mick's journey has come to an end

RIP wonderful man Michael John Orr

who passed on June 2nd 2014

XXX

Mo

User
Posted 02 Oct 2014 at 22:20

Lovely Mo....hope you are ok

Bri x

User
Posted 02 Oct 2014 at 22:30

Sounds such a lovely if poignant occasion. It must be hard at times becasue you are in places you have shared with Mick. But you have been there with Mick in spirit, he knew you would do this and so his wishes have been respected. Stay with people and you will be fine. Thinking of you, Mandy!

User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 07:36

Thinking of you, Mo. Glad you were able to give Mick's ashes a home and the snake was duly re-directed !

Love, Fiona.

User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 08:44

Mo,

I just wanted to send my love at this difficult time.

I'm fairly new to this community but since I joined I've always felt close to you because at 8.30am, 2nd June I was having my biopsy which revealed I had PCa.  An awful time in my life, but for you, even worst.  I'm really sorry that Michael lost his battle against this dreadful disease. He was very lucky to have you with him to share his life.  There's nothing I can say that can take away the pain, I just wanted to know how I feel.

Thinking of you.

Love,

Steve  

User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 10:01

A lovely, touching post. Have a safe journey home.

Stay Calm And Carry On.
User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 11:04

Dear Mo,

What a wonderful, very moving story.

It looks like everything went perfectly, and Mick will be so proud of you.

Yes, you're starting over, and I have no doubt you'll do it in you own indomitable style.

We're now looking forward to have you safely home, and seeing you amongst us all on Dec 3rd in London.

You may be crushed by all the hugs given that day.

And Steve? You'll get to meet this very special lady in person!

Warmest wishes,
Always,

George

User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 12:03

George,

Looking forward to it.

Steve

User
Posted 03 Oct 2014 at 13:32

Mo

 

What a touching story - you can feel the love you obviously had for each other.  It's not fair that this awful disease has taken a good man from you but you will always be welcome in this club that nobody wanted to join http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-embarassed.gif. That you still have time to think about the rest of us is amazing. Look forward to seeing you in December http://community.prostatecanceruk.org/editors/tiny_mce/plugins/emoticons/img/smiley-embarassed.gif

 

Nil desperandum

Allister

 
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