PSA 7.3 - referred to urologist

Sign out from this forum stay off the internet, have a couple of glasses of wine with your wife and son enjoy Xmas and stop worrying until after the festivities because you will not die between now and then.

Bless you.

I have calmed down because I took a drink and I do not drink. It was a gift from a teaching colleague "a bottle of Haig whiskey" - for a non-drinker, the glass I had was a little too big. It took a while, but then it hit me and I felt great and s*** at the same time; better than just feeling the latter every day. My wife went mad and I feel sorry about that (I have since sobered up, this was a bout 5 hours ago). I then had a good chat to my son and he basically told me to pull myself together because the way I am is not worthy of me & although he wasn't showing it the whole thing was really affecting him.

Haig

Thank you everyone. I am leaving to go to my mother's today. No internet access, so no more me, I'm afraid. 

Again, my thanks to you all for trying to help me.

Haig

No you are not one of the brave at the moment. I am beginning to wonder if you will be ok if you get the all clear anyway. I am a bit puzzled as to why you saw your mum on your own yesterday????

Best wishes

Ann

I am sorry you are struggling with this. Uncertainty is not an easy thing to deal with. The first thing to remember is that until you have the results, you don't know anything for sure. The second is that you are in the system now and being looked after. What that means is that you will get the right treatment and the right time for whatever condition you are in. Statistically your odds are good as PCa is far less of a challenge than many cancers as a whole.

You need to remember that there are a whole series of curative treatments that start the game. The odds are good that you'll be down one of these paths and will "only" have a few scars and other side effects to remember this period by. Beyond that there are a whole host of treatments that can be used to follow up any early challenges.

The key is to get on top of things as much as you can physically and mentally (diet, sleep, exercise etc.). May I also suggest two things:

1) Seek out a qualified counsellor (ideally one who has cancer experience) to talk all this through. I suspect you will find they can help with your current fears and help you figure out why they are so intense. They will be able to help you develop coping strategies.

2) Get off the bl**dy internet! You are not alone in delving into the research to see what may lie ahead. The problem is that we are not medical professionals and it is proven fact (I found this out doing my thesis) that we over exaggerate things when doing our research. If you have questions, direct them to someone in the know, be that your medical professional or a PCUK/McMillan nurse.

You are in good hands in the NHS and they will do their nest for you. In the mean time, take it one day at a time and focus on your family - enjoy your time with them and enjoy Xmas.

Regards

PP

Pete. Your words are lovely. I have seen your own struggles in working through various older posts on here. You had your RP and then had to have SRT and I can only marvel at the way you handle things. But that's just it - I can see what I should do, but am in an inescapable hole of mental pain. Others have also said I need professional help and maybe I can ask this when they tell me of my cancer in January. I am planning also to go down the RP route, but although I questioned my MRI scan (this is how I found out of the PIRAD 4) and the consultant said it was contained - how does he know for sure? Even if it is, I will likely get a high Gleason and worry incessantly about recurrence. I also don't know what I'd do, if, like you, I had gone through RP to be told it didn't work.

I thank you for replying to me - it means masses to me and I sit here waiting for one of the brave, humble people to try to give me some encouragement. 

H